Hopefully I've given you all enough time to get over my last post. Sorry if it was a bit intense. I'm back to my normal groaning and sarcastic self. Now the title of this post may lead you to think that I have surrendered and in an attempt to placate my feeling towards the symptoms of pregnancy have hit the bottle and guzzled as much shandy booze as I can get my hands on. Not so.
The booze politics refers to a 'slight disagreement' that I have been having with my husband. In order to protect his identity I promised to refer to him as Mr X (We laughed at that a lot) In fact, over lunch yesterday, I threatened to put him in this blog so that I could get some feedback and prove to him that I am right. (hopefully!)
Now, he also asked me to make this a balanced post and include some of his positive attributes before I reveal his dreadful behaviour, so that he doesn't come across as a total, utter swine! So, here is a short list of things he has done in the last seven months that were good.
- He made me dinner last night whilst I had an unscheduled nap with the cat. (although the cynical side of me thinks that this may have been as a direct result of the aforementioned threats at lunch. Hmmm....)
- He picks up all the random 'dropped' items that I leave strewn about the house because I can no longer bend in the middle. My car keys, chunks of carrot, my toothbrush etc
- He does my buckle flip flops up for me.
- He helps me get up off the sofa/floor (even if it is accompanied by a jovial exclamation of "HEAVE!")
- He is reading his pregnancy book. So that we don't have a repeat of him saying things like "how am I supposed to check how dilated your cervix is" which was met with an understandable look of horror from me!
- He gave me a back massage and did not expect anything in return. I have been informed that this was particularly difficult and worth a huge amount of 'husband points'
OK. Gushy puke fest over. I hope that is enough, darling Mr X, to paint you in a positive light. Now for the dreadful behaviour I mentioned.
For the last decade Ja..I mean MR X and I have had a fairly balanced relationship. We don't bullshit each other. We don't hold grudges once an issue has been discussed and dealt with and we share our lives with each other as much as we can without pissing each other off. He puts the bins out. (I thought this happened magically) and I do the shopping list. Our chores are fairly evenly shared and we live in relative harmony.
We spread our social life pretty evenly too. We try to see as many friends as possible and keep up with people. We both love going out and socialising and we get bored very easily. It's rare we spend a day doing nothing. (Unless of course we were hungover in which case you could find our grey pallid little bodies covered in bits of crisp and pizza cheese, quaffing glasses of 'fat' Coke and watching back to back movies on a duvet and pillow mountain we called 'the nest')
That was until in January of this year The Hitchhiker came on the scene. I immediately gave up all the lovely stuff that you are supposed to give up. The lovely booze. The lovely cigarettes. Coarse french duck liver pate, brie and Camembert, runny eggs (I'm starting to dribble) and anything I used to put on my face to stop the adolescent breakouts that I still get at the ripe old age of 30! *shakes fist*
I would never expect Mr X to give up booze and going out because it is me that is carrying the baby and not him. Although, to his credit he also gave up the fagarillos! I get that in October he will be able to go out even less and so should enjoy himself within reason and his dreadfully boring hobby (golf) as much as possible.
HOWEVER..we also used to share the role of designated driver and take it in turns to drive when needed so that we each had a chance to have a drink. Something that my darling husband has not done for the last seven months. EVERY time we have gone out, either for a meal or to see friends I have ended up being the one who drives us home because I cant drink. I have become our chauffeur. In fact on several occasions this has included me waiting for him to stop drinking so that I can drive us the hour drive home. At midnight.
The reason that this argument has reared its ugly head again is that we have two social events coming up where drinking will be involved and we are currently in negotiations as to who will drive us home. I don't think it should automatically be presumed that I will drive. I'm seven months pregnant FFS!
If the flip side of this was that for nine months following the birth he becomes 'DES' then fair enough. I will dutifully 'do my time' and not complain from this point on. However, Mr X laughed at this and as yet the two social events we have coming up are still being disputed. So which of us is right? Please enlighten me before I burst hulk like and give him a thorough thrashing.
AAAAARRRRGGGHHH!!!
Annnnnnnd breath......
